47 Comments
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Brittney Cunningham's avatar

I think the most remarkable thing about this, is when this story initially hit my email, I never questioned the plausibility of a Viagra car wash in Miami. My first thought was: "Miami-ans are probably innovating massage parlors." We are the nation that brought the world the Dorito-Taco and Peepsi. Americans thrive on uniting unexpected business concepts for profit. Now we expect it. In fact, whenever a person announces a new business venture that doesn't offer me a combo, I am outraged.

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Perhaps You Can Relate...'s avatar

100% had the same thought: if one were to exist, it would be in Vegas or Miami. 😂

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Brittney Cunningham's avatar

It seemed like a natural progression!

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Sharon Buchbinder, PhD's avatar

I think the good Lord above that you have investigated this for us and found out so my husband Earl doesn’t run down to El carwash and try to find himself some Viagra pills!

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Tina Ige's avatar

Right?

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Susie's avatar

Took the words right outta my mouth!!! 👏🏻💜

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Marty Merzer's avatar

El Al?

What does Israel’s national airline have to do with this?

cc: El Mossad.

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Dave Barry's avatar

Don't be a wiseass, Marty. You're a real reporter. I'M the wiseass.

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Ned's avatar

The other good news is that the person or persons responsible did not say El Car Wash offered discount "Mifepristone." If they had, the new administration would have shut it down, and you'd be out the money you paid for the Graphene package.

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Dale of Green Gables's avatar

Dave, as I've said (at least one time) in the past, you always manage to rise to the occasion. Don't know about another Pulitzer, but certainly a candidate for the inaugural "Dr. Ruth Memorial 'Get Some!'" Award. Understand it comes with a discount coupon for Morty's House of Really Cheap Generics in Orlando.

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SnarfyNewcomerOpinesBasically's avatar

feel like this is TMI. Please, dale keep you and Dave's personal life out of this

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Dale of Green Gables's avatar

You'll have to do better here. Not The Gene Pool.

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SnarfyNewcomerOpinesBasically's avatar

thank goodness

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Robot Bender's avatar

I see those quotation marks around "journalism," Dave. You're not fooling me. 😉

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Bill Dunn's avatar

Oh, I guess I should cancel my flight to Miami now.

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Tom!'s avatar

Keep up the…well, just the good work I guess, until you can locate the discount Viagra.

🤪

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DrBDH's avatar

I treasure every example of how stunningly stupid AI is. It’s the perfect companion to crypto currency.

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Kim Capes's avatar

Thank you for the timely update. I was following this story closely because I don’t feel like emptying the dishwasher. Also, I think El Car Cash is a typo, but in Spanish.

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Dave Barry's avatar

It was indeed a typo ("el typo"). I have corrected it. Thanks.

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Kim Capes's avatar

De nada.

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Steve Pietrowicz's avatar

Pills that size? Must be generic Viagra. Good thing they're at a discrount.

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Vicky Meehan's avatar

When I shared your Substack article on the viagra (before this one), the person I shared it with responded, "I have actually run into that very situation at the General Grant Car Wash in South Saint Louis." So apparently, there ARE some carwashes that have deemed it profitable to offer vending machine viagra. Unfortunately, my friend did not photograph the machine he had come across and said he only happened to be there on a fluke so not likely to return again. But all told, it's a very interesting topic for discussion!

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Jessica Hribar's avatar

I've been to that car wash several times! Not to get my car washed, but because they carry my favorite brand of earrings. No, as the great man says, I am not making this up. It wouldn't surprise me if they have other improbable merchandise. I'll investigate the next time I go there and report back.

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Tina Ige's avatar

Don't you just love when that happens?! Where do you think I get all my trendy fanny packs?

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bdipacio's avatar

Thank you for making me laugh till I cry. A tough thing these days...except for the crying part.😅

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Natasha's avatar

I’m interested in the one that looks like a Twinky.

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wiredog's avatar

So I guess if you ate one of those pills you would end up looking something like this guy:

https://www.artic.edu/artworks/22527/crucifix

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Perhaps You Can Relate...'s avatar

There is a lot going on here... Two things I really appreciated that AI felt were necessary design elements for a Viagra vending machine are, first, the Lisa Frank motif color selection, and second, the fact that many of the pills displayed distinctly resemble wrapped sausage links. I wonder if that was to serve as an indicator of dosage intensity? AI clearly had a lot of fun coming up with a very meta-design concept with the prompt you gave it. 😆🤖💊

Thank you so much for this! My poor husband thought I was having a cardiac episode from my inability to breathe due to uncontrollable laughter. 🤣🤣🤣

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